


where the lovelight gleams

by midnights



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: All I Want For Christmas Is Love Actually, Angst, Birthday, Birthday Fluff, Childhood Friends, Christmas, Christmas Dinner, Christmas Eve, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Mistletoe, OT5, Sleepovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-24
Updated: 2014-12-24
Packaged: 2018-03-03 05:09:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2839208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/midnights/pseuds/midnights
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>louis has spent exactly sixteen christmases with harry. he's been in love with him for exactly ten.</p><p>ft. stupid, silly boys who don't know they're in love, an ot5 sleepover, and christmas eve with the tomlinson-deakins</p>
            </blockquote>





	where the lovelight gleams

**Author's Note:**

> this is my entry for the All I want For Christmas is Love Actually exchange ! i had a lot of fun writing this, and the majority of it was written in just a day ! hope you enjoy ^.^  
> title is from 'i'll be home for christmas'. also when i made the tumblr post linking this fic, first i forgot to link it, AND i put the wrong title. i put the title of my last fic... the title here is the correct one lmao  
> also this isnt beta'd because im too impatient  
> you should all come tell me how much you loved it on [tumblr](http://harryindallas.tumblr.com/) !!!  
>  **disclaimer: this is a work of fiction. all personalities are based off of interviews and videos, and i don't intend to imply anything about the behavior of the boys off-screen. ******

_\- December 23rd, 2014 -_

In a little white house in Doncaster, there lived a little boy named Louis Tomlinson.

In the house next door, there lived a little boy named Harry Styles.

Their mothers, Jay and Anne, had been friends for a while, which meant Harry and Louis saw a lot of each other as they grew up. With their other neighbors Zayn, Liam, and Niall, all somewhere around the same age, the five of them grew up together on Snowball Lane. They spent their winters making snow angels and building igloos, and their summers swimming in Liam’s pool and playing footy on his deck.

They used to swear that they’d never separate. Until uni, that was. But they were young, they had loads of time. Until suddenly, Louis was graduating from Year 13, and headed off to Uni.

And then they stopped being so close, once they all went off to Uni. It’s not that they stopped being friends, of course not, but it was hard for them to stay close when they were all in separate parts of the country. It wasn't on purpose, goodness no.

Somewhere along the way, Louis realized he loved Harry a lot more than normal. He was terrified at first. Now, it just makes him a bit sad. Harry's never at home when Louis comes back to see his family. It always makes him think that maybe, just maybe, if he hadn't been such a coward about his feelings for Harry, it would be Harry he was coming home to see.

Instead, he finds himself boarding the train only an hour and a half after his final exam, with his bag on his back and his tea in hand. It's the 23rd of December, only a few hours until Louis's birthday, and, more importantly, Christmas Eve. His mum, her husband Dan, and Louis's sisters and brother have been eagerly awaiting his arrival. In fact, as Louis boards his train, he gets a message from Lottie, asking what time he'll be home. He types out a reply as he finds a seat and settles himself in it.

As he nears his station, little snowflakes begin to fall. It's almost two when he arrives at number 28, Snowflake Lane, a little white house all done up with lights and wreaths and little glowing stars in the windows. Louis wonders who put the lights up, since he hasn't been home since his last long weekend, which was in October. He steps through a few inches of snow and knocks on the door.

Almost immediately, two blond girls with the same toothy smiles ambush him with hugs.

"Louis!" Daisy shouts.

"Lottie, Lou's here, come see!" Phoebe yells, jumping up to give Louis a kiss on the cheek.

"There's my favorite girls! Almost said my favorite  _twins_ , but, we've got another set round here now, haven't we?" he drops his voice to a whisper. "Don't worry, though. You're still my favorites. Just don't tell the others, yeah?" The girls laugh. Louis picks up Phoebe first, holding her tight and giving her a sloppy, overexaggerated kiss on the cheek.

Phoebe squirms out of his arms. "Oh,  _yuck_!"

Louis turns to Daisy. "Your tuuuuurn!" He sings, picking Daisy up with fake difficulty. "Bloody hell, Dais, lay off the Christmas cookies, would ya?"

"Lou!" Daisy whacks his chest.

"Aw, I'm kidding, love." Louis kisses her cheek and sets her on the floor. "What're you now, twelve?"

"Actually," Daisy begins.

"Twelve and a half." Phoebe finishes.

Louis makes a face. "Still doing the sentence thing, are we?"

The twins don't have a chance to answer, though, as two older girls come in, one with blond hair and one with caramel brown, each with blue eyes and smiles like their mum's. One is taller than the other, but Louis is quite sure the taller one is not his sister. The taller one steps towards Louis, with her hair plaited back and wearing a Christmas sweater with reindeer on it.

"And who would you be?" He asks, looking at Lottie curiously. Lottie laughs. "Surely not Charlotte Tomlinson? God, you already look more grown up than I do!"

"Is that an insult, Mr. Penguin pajamas?" Lottie raises her eyebrows.

Louis makes an insulted face. “Do you have a problem with my penguin pajamas, Lot?”

“Not at all, not at all.” Lottie laughs and Louis pulls her into a hug.

Fizzy steps forward, her hair pulled into a bun, wearing a Christmas sweater similar to Lotties, and wearing an even bigger smile. “Hey, Lou.” She says quietly.

“Hello, darling. How’s my Fizz?” Louis asks, a smile splitting his face.

Fizzy pulls him into a hug, and Louis kisses the top of her head. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, kiddo.” Louis grins.

“Girls? Is that Louis?” Louis hears his stepdad Dan’s voice call.

Louis picks up his bag and puts it on the steps, and then makes his way into the kitchen. Though it isn’t particularly large, Louis has always loved his little kitchen. The table barely fits all of them anymore, doubly so since the twins arrived. Standing in front of the stove is Dan, with Ernie on his hip, stirring something. He looks up when Louis comes in, and a smile breaks over his face.

“Hey, Louis. How’ve you been?” Dan asks.

Louis steps forward grinning. “Good, Danny boy. Really good. Can I see this guy?”

“Go ahead.” Dan holds out Ernie, who makes a little noise as he’s passed to Louis.

“Hey there, little guy. How’s my favorite brother?” Louis asks happily, taking one of Ernie’s little chubby hands.

Ernest makes a little happy baby noise, and Louis grins harder.

“Your mum’s upstairs, if you want to go see her, Lou.” Dan says, holding out his arms for Ernie.

Louis bounces up and down a few times, and Ernie laughs. “Yeah, I should go and say hello.” He places Ernie in Dan’s arms. “There you go, little man.”

Making his way back into the foyer, Louis grabs his bag and heads upstairs. His mum is in Ernie and Doris’s room, holding an almost-sleeping Doris in her arms. She doesn’t hear Louis when he comes in, to he has to knock on the wall for her to look up. Her hair has been haphazardly pulled into a bun at the back of her head, and she's got on that red sweater that Louis got her for Christmas a few years ago.

“Lou? I didn’t think you’d be back this early!” Jay says happily. She puts Doris in her crib and envelops Louis in a warm hug. Louis sighs. He missed Jay’s hugs.

“Good to see you, Mum.” He says into her shoulder.

Jay releases him, a huge smile on her face. “It’s been far too long, darling. Did you get in alright?”

“Yeah, the train didn't get delayed ‘cause of the snow or anything, so it was on time.” Louis nods.

“Glad to hear it. Listen, I’ve got a big dinner to get ready for tomorrow night, so put your stuff in your room, have a shower and then get your arse into the kitchen and help me cook.” Jay says, smacking Louis’s bum lightly before picking up Doris again.

Louis gasps. “Mum!”

“Get that bag into your room,” She says, breezing past him.

Louis narrows his eyes. “If I go in there, and you’ve made it into me and Lottie’s ‘shared room’ or something evil like that, I will be very upset.”

He picks up his duffel and heads to his room. When Louis opens the door, Zayn is sitting in his chair, dressed in jeans and a Christmas sweater with his feet on the desk, looking to all the world like some kind of male model. He looks up at Louis slowly, his face dramatically brooding, and stands.

“Well, if it isn’t Louis Tomlinson, returned from his acclaimed Uni.”

A smile breaks over Louis’s face, and he launches himself at the boy in front of him.

“ _Zayn_.” He breathes, his arms wrapping around Zayn’s frame and holding him close.

Zayn hugs him back just as tight, and Louis breathes in the familiar scent of his Gucci cologne.

“What’re you doing here?” Louis asks as soon as they separate.

Zayn shrugs, grinning. “Well, I hadn’t seen the girls since the last time I was home, and I got back on Friday, so I figured it was time to visit them.”

“Hey!” Louis whacks his arm. “Really, though, what’re you doing here?”

“To see you, obviously.” Zayn rolls his eyes.

“Are the other lads back?” Louis cocks his head, and moves his bag onto his bed.

“Liam’s been back since last Tuesday, he’s at home, Niall’s been back since Thursday, he’s hanging at Liam’s, and Harry got home yesterday. He’s at his house now too.” Zayn says.

“Liam’s been back since  _Tuesday_?” Louis’s jaw drops, and Zayn laughs.

“Yeah, it’s hardly fair. You should stop by the house and see me mum and sisters, ‘ve been asking about you. And you should go and visit the lads, when you’re done cooking.” Zayn suggests.

Louis nods. “Yeah, I think I will. ‘m gonna go shower, I’ll give you a call when I’m done helping my mum, and we can all get together, yeah?”

“Yeah, sure.” Zayn heads for the door. “Later, Louis.”

Louis gives a little wave as he leaves, and then goes and sits on his bed. The bed makes a creaking sound like a dying animal and shifts as Louis sits on it. It’s still got the same old duvet as it used to, a plain blue one that’s a lot warmer than it looks. The old Rovers posters are still pasted on his walls, two of three beginning to peel off. There’s a pair of old Vans under his desk, and a t-shirt from his last trip home on the windowsill.

After he’s reveled in the beauty that is his own bedroom, Louis digs a pair of clean pants out of his bag and heads for the shower.

When he’s all washed up, and his hair is sticking out in a hundred different directions, Louis makes his way into his room, but, for the second time today, he’s not the only one in there. Daisy and Phoebe are standing there, faces each as red as a tomato, in front of Louis’s completely opened bag.

“I’ve been home for less than a half hour, and you’re already poking around my room?” He snaps, scrambling for a pair of jeans; he’s only got on his briefs.

Phoebe coughs, and Daisy speaks up. “We just wanted to see what you got us...” She frowns.

“for Christmas.” Phoebe finishes.

Louis pales. “You didn’t find it, did you?”

“No.” Phoebe shakes her head.

“We only just got in here, as you always take forever in the shower.” Daisy explains.

“Alright, well, get out, I’ve got to get dressed.” Louis puts his hands on his hips.

The twins hurry out, giggles bubbling past their twelve year-old lips. Louis flops on his bed again, only to stand again when he sees that the twins left the door open. Once it’s closed, Louis pulls a long-sleeved shirt out of his bag and pulls it on, then sets the alarm on his phone for a half hour from now. Once again, he collapses on his bed, and settles in for a nap.

It feels like he’s only been asleep for seconds, but Louis’s phone is going off.

He groans audibly and shuts it off. It probably takes somewhere around ten minutes for him to actually get out of bed and pull himself together enough to go downstairs.

When he gets into the kitchen, Lottie, Fizz, and his mum are already at the helm, cooking up a storm. Louis’s not really sure what exactly his mum wants him to  _do_ , as he’s complete shit when it comes to cooking. He doesn’t even know how to whisk.

Jay turns around from the potatoes that she’s chopping and grins. “Well hel _lo_ , Louis. So nice of you to join us.”

“Yeah, well,” Louis suppresses a yawn. “dunno what you need me to do, Mum, you know I can’t cook.”

“Oh, I know that very well.” Jay says gravely, and the girls laugh. “That’s why you’re only helping Lottie with cookies. Can you do that?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Louis pouts, watching as Lottie comes over with her arms full of ingredients.

Louis spends the next fifteen minutes singing along to the Christmas songs that Fizzy’s put on and following Lottie’s instructions, which mostly consist of “stir it”. Once the dough has been properly mixed, though apparently they have to “roll it out”. Louis has no clue what this “rolling out” process consists of, but it sounds like it’ll be almost as tedious as mixing the dough. Apparently rolling out dough is the final step before using the cookie cutters, the thing Louis had been looking forward to the most.

“Mum, who put those lights up out front? I know you wouldn’t let any of the girls up on the roof.” Louis asks as Lottie rolls out the dough on the table.

Jay doesn’t look up from the celery she’s chopping. “Zayn and Harry, of course. Put ‘em up just yesterday.”

Harry was at the house? Louis doesn’t say anything.

Once Lottie’s rolled out the dough, Louis grabs a Christmas tree-shaped cookie cutter and begins. He sends Daisy and Phoebe, who’ve been watching them in fascination for a while, into the living room to turn up the music, and then chases after them. He grabs Daisy first, putting one hand on her hip and taking her hand with the other, and twirling her around in time with the music. Phoebe starts calling for Fizz and Lottie as Mariah Carey comes on, saying she desperately needs a dance partner. Jay comes in as well, and soon all of them are twirling around the living room (not the twins, though, they’re in their playard, giggling at their bad dance moves).

As Louis is trying to hit the high notes of the song with an imaginary microphone in his hand, someone opens the door. Louis only hears it though, because his eyes are closed for dramatic effect.

“Harry!” He hears Daisy yell, and then his eyes snap open.

There, standing in the foyer, is Harry. And holy hell, he’s even more beautiful than Louis remembered, all pale skin and rose-pink lips and bottle-green eyes, and even longer hair than before. It’s messily parted to the side, all curly and unruly and dusted with snowflakes. He grins as Daisy runs towards him and tackles him in a hug, and Louis stops singing. When Harry is let out of Daisy’s iron grip, the other girls demand hugs, and then head back into the kitchen. And then it’s Louis’s turn.

He stands on tiptoe to wrap his arms around Harry’s neck, as it’s possible that he’s gotten even taller in the four months since Louis’s last seen him. Harry’s arms wrap around his waist, and they  _fit so well together_  it feels like Louis’s been missing a piece of himself and it’s only just now been returned. He breathes in that same smell of his cologne and roses and  _Harry_ , and then starts to groan as Harry squeezes him really tight.

“Ooh,” He groans. “H… too tight…”

Harry lets go right away, his face turning pink. “Right, sorry.”

“Did you actually get taller? How very dare you grow up without me, Harry.” Louis frowns.

Harry hugs him again. “I missed you.”

“Mmm, I missed you too, curly.” Louis smiles. “When did your hair get this long, hm?” He tugs on Harry’s hair.

“Well, hair tends to grow, Lou.” Harry laughs, and they separate, just as Doris starts laughing about something in her playard.

Louis heads over to the playard and scoops her up, motioning for Harry to do the same to Ernie. His littlest sister has a huge smile on her face, and it only gets bigger as Louis takes her little hand and starts dancing with her. The sound of her laughter puts a smile on Louis’s face and, oh,  _god_ , he missed these kids. The other girls, and Jay, have all gone back into the kitchen, but Louis is completely content with just dancing with Harry and his youngest siblings.

When Louis looks over at Harry, there’s a smile on his face brighter than all the lights on the tree, and the bright look in his eyes makes Louis’s heart want to melt. The oven goes off soon, so Harry and Louis head into the kitchen with armfuls of twins and hand them off to Fizz and Lottie and help put the sprinkles on the cookies.

Louis sits on the counter and watches as his mum prepares the turkey, and Harry comes and stands next to him. It feels so strange to see Harry after such a long time, but at the same time it feels like nothing’s changed at all. That’s not true, though. Everything’s changed. In about than six hours, Louis will be twenty three. And in less than two months, Harry will be twenty one.

A large, warm hand pats his thigh, and Louis looks over at Harry. Pale skin and rosy cheeks give way to a defined jawline and a pair of amaranth lips. A hand with long, nimble, fingers and two rings runs through messy, long hair the color of dark chocolate. A set of forest-green eyes with unfairly long lashes are looking at him expectantly. Apparently Harry’s been saying something. Louis was a little…  _distracted_.

“Sorry?” Louis blinks.

Harry smiles that lopsided smile Louis’s always been a sucker for, and the one dimple pops into his left cheek. “If you were  _listening_  to me, you would’ve heard that I said we should go and get our snow stuff on and get the boys to do the same. Snow’s getting a bit deep.” Harry says. “Dunno why I’m surprised you didn’t hear me, though. You never did go in for listening, did you?”

Louis frowns. “I am a very good listener, alright? I just have selective hearing sometimes.”

Harry’s hand is still on his thigh, and Louis is sure it’s burning a hole through his jeans.

“Trust me, I know.” Harry rolls his eyes.

“Oh, get out. And don’t come back until you’re wearing that pink beanie that you know you stole from me when you were eighteen!” Louis narrows his eyes at Harry, who laughs and makes for the door.

“Don’t pretend you don’t still have my jumpers, Lou.” He calls on his way out.

Louis bites down on his lip to keep himself from smiling and looks down at the floor. Once he’s regained his composure, Louis hops off the counter and heads into his room, where he finds his snow clothes stuffed under his bed from last year. He pulls on his long johns and a pair of wool socks, and then his snow pants and jacket. When he finally heads outside, he feels quite like a snowman- all bundled up and poofy.

Harry’s already back, laying in a snowdrift and wearing the pink beanie as promised. He doesn’t look up when Louis comes out, so Louis nails him in the side with a perfectly crafted snowball.

“Ouch!” Harry yells, rolling sideways.

Louis cackles and watches Harry struggle to stand in his bulky snow stuff. After a while, Louis walks over and helps him up, and they start walking towards Zayn’s house, as it’s closest. Louis’s clunky snow boots drag through the powdery snow, and it’s a struggle for them to make it four houses down.

When they finally reach the Malik household, Louis and Harry approach the door and ring the bell. In a few seconds, Zayn’s mum, Tricia, is opening the door. She laughs when she sees them, and shakes her head.

“I feel like this is some odd flashback where you’re going to ask me to send Zayn out… am I right, boys?” Tricia asks, cocking her head.

“Zayn Malik is needed in his snow stuff as soon as possible, Ma'am.” Louis says loudly.

Tricia laughs again. “Yes, I’ll send him out.”

“Thanks, Tricia.” Harry says.

“I’m glad to see you home at the same time, you two. It seems like you’re always alternating.” Tricia says.

Harry and Louis look at each other. Harry shrugs, and Tricia smiles and goes to get Zayn. After a minute, Louis turns around to face the street and sits on the porch.

“Anything noteworthy happen while we’ve been away?” Harry asks, sitting next to him.

Louis scoffs. Him and Harry making idle conversation? He’s quite sure this is a first. “Well… I think Lottie’s dating some chap from school, but that’s about it.” He shrugs. “Oh! I am now the oldest of seven.”

“Oh, are you? I had no idea.” Harry laughs.

“Yeah, almost a year now.” Louis nods. “Quite the loud household, now. What’s new with you, huh? I mean, besides your absurdly long hair.”

Harry’s face turns pink, and he goes to touch his hair- only to remember that there’s a hat over it. “You don’t- you don’t like it? I thought it- I just thought it made me look older, and -”

“No! Of course I like it, you big dope.” Louis says quickly, and Harry’s shoulders sag in relief. “I liked your hair when it was all in your face, and when you wore that quiff, and I like it now.”

“Oh. Thanks.” A small smile is all Louis can coax out of him. “Um- not much new stuff’s happened, really. Well, Gemma’s dating one of my friends from school, so that’s a bit weird and new, I s’pose.”

“Really? Who?” Louis pries.

Harry looks away. “Oh, uh, you wouldn’t know him. Real nice kid, though. Name’s Ashton.”

“Oh.” Is all Louis says, because that’s probably how all of Harry’s stories from school will go.  _Oh, you wouldn’t know them_ \- of fucking course he wouldn’t know them- Harry’s never invited him up to visit! Not that Louis’s ever invited him, but that’s because Harry never has, and it’s also not important. Harry could have a  _girlfriend_ , for all Louis knows. And he’s about to ask if he does have one, but Zayn comes out, all dressed in his snow stuff, just in time.

“Well well well, if it isn’t Harry and Louis.” Zayn says in a low voice.

Louis looks up. All bundled up in what looks to be a Ravenclaw scarf and hat, plus his usual snow clothes, Zayn is smirking at them.

“Nice hat.” Harry chuckles.

“Yeah, if I remember right, that’s your Christmas present to me, from a few years ago. So laugh away, asshole.” Zayn snaps, and walks past him.

Louis narrows his eyes and grabs a handful of snow, smushing it into a crude circle. He throws it at Zayn, and it hits him in the bum. A laugh escapes from Louis’s mouth, one of the only sounds in the snow-silent night. The three of them start towards Niall’s house, their feet dragging through the snow, which is up to their shins now.

They don’t talk much on the way to Niall’s, as talking would use up precious energy needed for walking. The Horan house is all done up for Christmas: lights line the roofs and windows, each tree is wound in lights as well, and there’s a large wreath hung on the door. There’s also a pair of snow boots drying out on the front porch.

Harry is the one to ring the doorbell, while Louis and Zayn stand on his either side. Maura, Niall’s mum, comes to the door with a smile on her face. “You know, you three could be twelve years old again and no one would know the difference.”

Louis laughs. “Can we borrow Niall?” He asks.

“Oh, I almost forgot!” Maura pulls Louis into a hug. Louis feels bad- he’s probably getting her sweater wet with all the snow on him. “Welcome home, Louis!”

“Aw, thanks, Maura.” Louis grins as Maura kisses his cheek.

“I’ll go and get Niall.” She says, and hurries back inside.

Ten minutes later, a visibly excited Niall is sent out the door, dressed in his snow stuff. “Lou!” He yells, wrapping Louis in his second bear hug in fifteen minutes. Louis grins and hugs him back.

“Good to see you, Niall.” He straightens his hat.

“To Liam’s, then?” He asks.

Louis nods. “Yeah.”

“How come none of you twats told me Louis was home?” Niall frowns as they start walking. “Bloody rude, that was.”

None of them answer but Harry, who shoves Niall into the snow.

When they finally get Liam outside, he’s a bit annoyed at all of them. “I mean, none of you even bothered to tell me he’s been home all day!”

“Hey, I didn’t know ‘til ten minutes ago.” Niall says.

“Oh, shut it, Liam. I’m home, big deal. Now, sit down, all of you, and I’ll go get us something to drink.” Louis snaps.

Harry looks around Louis’s snow-covered front yard. “Sit down?” He cocks his head.

“In the snow, you idiot!” Louis yells, opening the door.

He steps inside, and, following the orders of his mother, takes off his wet boots. Three sisters immediately start asking if they can come hang outside with them, and Louis finally tells them they can with an exasperated sigh. Fizz, Daisy, and Phoebe run upstairs to put on their snow stuff, and Louis makes his way into the kitchen, where Dan and Jay are taking out the turkey for tomorrow’s dinner.

“Mum, why’ve you got so much food to get ready? Is anyone coming over tomorrow but us?” Louis asks, grabbing a few cans of beer from the fridge.

Jay makes a face. “Harry’s family’s coming over for dinner, and we’ve got to make sure we have enough.” She explains.

Louis nods and heads for the door. “Tell Fizz and the twins we’re just out front, will you?” He asks.

“Sure, yeah.” Jay calls. “And be nice!” She adds.

Louis groans as he puts on his boots and makes his way outside. The boys are all on their knees in the snow, carefully shaping what looks to be a sideways, refrigerator-sized lump of snow. He heads over to them and stops a little short. None of them look up.

“So… what’re we making here?” Louis asks.

Harry grins. “A snow sofa.”

“That’s a rectangle.” Louis tosses him a pint.

“Well, Louis, it  _will_  be a sofa, alright? I have designed it, it is my masterpiece.” Zayn says sternly.

“If you designed it, it’ll probably function as a sofa. If Niall designed it, it’ll collapse as soon as we sit. So let’s see.” Louis tosses each of his friends a pint, opens his own with one freezing cold hand, and sits.

His bum meets hard snow, and Louis is surprised that he’s not finding himself under a foot of snow. The other boys sit down with him, and they each take a sip of their pints just as the girls come outside. Zayn looks over at Louis and wrinkles his nose.

“I told them they could come out, but they don’t have to stay too long.” Louis says sheepishly.

“It’s alright, we love the girls,  _right_ , Zayn?” Harry says harshly, and Zayn nods quickly.

Louis looks between them, confused. “Alright then... “ He says, leaning back.

Above him, a pewter-pink sky gives an eerie glow to the snow below, and the laughter of his friends and sisters is the only sounds in the night. Even when he was younger, Louis always loved the absolute silence of a snowy night. He and Harry used to sneak outside and sit on the roof of his house in silence, reveling in the noise of nothingness. Snowflakes are falling on his face and melting in quick succession, and all of Louis’s exposed skin is damp.

To his left, Harry’s hands are drawing designs in the snow beneath him, and Louis longs for Harry to be tracing those patterns into  _him_ , instead.

At midnight, the boys sing Happy Birthday to Louis, and each one gives him a big hug.

He doesn’t end up finishing his pint, it ends up with Niall instead, who drinks it all before they head back inside for warm pajamas and tea. Once finally inside the warm house, Louis sorts out pajamas for each of the boys, which end up being clothes left over from their sleepovers when they were younger. Louis leaves Niall, Liam, and Zayn in his room, and he and Harry head downstairs to make everyone tea.

Well, Louis sits on the counter while  _Harry_  makes everyone tea.

“Pass me the sugar?” Harry asks, reaching towards Louis and the spice cabinet.

Louis reaches up to grab the sugar. “Here you are, babe.”

“Thank you,” Harry sings, taking the sugar from Louis’s hands with his own.

His hands linger on Louis’s, large and warm and familiar. A stupid, silly grin splits Harry’s face, and it makes Louis grin, too. And then they’re laughing, pulling away from each other like dumb teenagers.

“Twenty three is old.” Louis frowns.

Harry wrinkles his nose. “Yeah, it really is. You sure you can carry that mug, sir? Let me help you up the stairs.”

“Watch yourself, Harry. I may be old, but I can still kick your little arse.” Louis glares at Harry, and he laughs.

Somehow they get five cups of tea upstairs, and deliver one to each of their friends, who are spread out in various states of drowsiness in Louis’s room.

“I already called the bed, so don’t even try to argue.” Zayn says. He’s laid out spread-eagle on Louis’s bed, and he waves his arms and legs around to make a point.

Louis frowns. “Actually, since this is my first night back, I believe that  _I_  get the bed, Zayn.”

Zayn mutters something Louis can’t hear, and Harry’s face flushes while the rest of the boys laugh.

“What?” Louis asks, looking around.

“Don’t worry about it.” Zayn puts his tea on Louis’s bedside table. “Go ahead and have the bed, Louis, I’ll just go with Liam and Niall.”

Louis is suspicious of Zayn’s sudden compliance. “Fine… Get on up, then. Harry, c’mon.”

The boys snicker, and Harry turns pink again.

“You’re laughing again.” Louis frowns, watching with wide eyes as Zayn stands.

“No, no. Just observing.” Zayn assures him.

Louis makes a face and climbs into his bed, which is still warm from Zayn’s body heat. Soon Harry’s in there too, curling up in front of Louis. Below them, Niall, Liam, and Zayn are spread out on top of a comforter, each of them entwined in some way, a hand draped over a chest, a foot over an ankle, whatever. It feels like they’re teenagers again, finally settling in after an hour of begging their parents to let them stay over.

“Any of you see that documentary on flamingos on Netflix?” Niall asks after they’ve all gotten settled.

There’s a pause. “No, Niall, I haven’t. I don’t really go in for the bird documentaries, though I’m sure some of them are very good.” Louis says slowly, and the boys laugh.

“Did you know that they turn pink ‘cause of all the pink stuff they eat? ‘Cause I sure as hell didn’t.” Niall says, and he sounds genuinely impressed.

“Honestly, Niall, why the  _bloody_  hell would any of us know that?” Zayn snaps, and a sharp  _slap_  rings through the room. “Ow!”

“Did you hit him?” Harry asks, voice hoarse with almost-sleep.

There’s a pause, and a groan from Zayn. “Right in the chest- bloody  _hell_ , Ni.”

Liam laughs. “Niall, don’t be rude.”

“You arseholes are the ones being rude. I was just asking a  _question_ , for god’s sake.” Niall hisses.

“Aw, did we hurt your feelings? We’re so sorry, Niall.” Louis pouts, Harry laughs.

Another pause, but not an awkward one. “I’m quite sure that my feet have never been this cold.” Harry says.

“C’mere, you idiot.” Louis whispers, and Harry scoots back into Louis’s chest. He’s still a little spoon; Louis could  _explode_  with fondness. Louis wraps his arms around Harry and holds him close, reveling in the warmth he radiates. A hand wraps around Louis’s, warm and large and comforting. He can smell Harry’s cologne again, like roses. With his chest pressed up against Harry’s back, even through their shirts, Louis can feel Harry’s heartbeat, strong and steady, like Harry.

It’s a while until anyone speaks.

“I feel like we should be on the roof or something.” Liam whispers into the darkness.

“Yeah, isn’t that what we always used to do?” Louis hears Niall whisper.

Zayn laughs. “Yeah, and it was always Lou’s, ‘cause his mum was always asleep.”

“I’m about to be asleep, so if you wouldn’t mind  _shutting your damn mouths_ , please.” Louis snaps.

The boys laugh, and Louis scoots closer to Harry. Harry hums in satisfaction, and it makes Louis smile. He closes his eyes, and succumbs to the draw of sleep.

In the morning, Louis is woken by the sound of Niall’s infections (and annoying) laughter. He disentangles himself from Harry’s long, warm limbs and looks down at the floor. Niall and Zayn are crouched over Liam’s sleepy form, emptying a can of whipped cream over his face.

“Oh,” Louis gasps. “Oh, yes.”

Niall looks up. “Shh! You’ll wake him up.”

“That’s the general idea, innit?” Zayn whispers.

“Lou, wake Harry up. He’ll want to see this, I think.” Niall says quickly.

Louis looks down at Harry. He’s beautiful even in his sleep, eyes closed, eyelashes fluttering, hair everywhere, mouth slightly open. Gently, Louis nudges Harry’s shoulder with his elbow, and his green eyes open slowly. He gives Louis a sleepy smile.

“Morning, Lou.” Harry mutters.

“Hey, Haz. Sleep alright?” Louis asks quietly.

Harry nods. “Always sleep good with you.”

“Right, yeah, sorry to interrupt your flirt-fest, but we’re gonna wake ‘im up now, alright?”

Five minutes later, they’re all feeling very guilty as Liam washes his hair out in the sink.

“It wasn’t my idea, Mum!” Louis says again.

Jay frowns. “And you’re not going to tell me whose idea it  _was_ , are you, Louis?”

“Well,” Louis grins and looks up. “I guess not, no.”

“Why has the towel cabinet been moved?” Liam calls from the bathroom.

Louis looks between his mum and the bathroom door. Jay sighs, and a small smile appears on her face. “Go on.”

With a peck to his mum’s cheek, Louis grabs a towel from the closet in the hallway and makes his way into the bathroom. He hands the towel to Liam and leans against the counter next to Zayn. Liam straightens up, working the towel through his wet hair. The room smells faintly of shampoo, and even though he’s washed it out, Louis can still smell the whipped cream. When he looks over, though, he sees that Niall is spraying it directly into his mouth.

“Aw, Niall, that’s gross. Nobody’s gonna wanna use that now.” Zayn groans.

Niall just shrugs, cheeks full of whipped cream.

“Liam, you done?” Harry asks.

Liam runs a hand through his messy hair. “ _Yes_.”

“Right then, let’s go downstairs and join the world, shall we lads?” Louis raises his eyebrows.

The five of them do exactly that.

Lottie makes them pancakes, with chocolate chips, bless her, and the boys devour them in minutes. The boys spend the next few hours lounging in the living room, draped over various pieces of furniture. Doris is on Harry’s chest, they’ve been making faces at each other for a while, and they’re just so  _cute_  it makes Louis want to burst into a thousand tiny pieces. Ernie is with Niall, sitting between his outstretched legs. Niall is holding each of his hands and making him dance to the music from the movie; Ernie keeps giggling quietly, and Niall laughs every time Ernie does.

Mouthwatering smells filter into the living room from the kitchen, and no matter how many times they ask (they ask a lot), Jay won’t let them try anything. Once it begins to near four, Niall, Zayn, and Liam begin to say their goodbyes.

“Thanks for letting us stay, Mrs. D.” Zayn calls on his way out.

Niall nods. “Yep, always a pleasure to be in the company of the Tomlinson-Deakins!”

“Happy Christmas everyone!” Liam says, and then it’s just Harry and Louis.

Louis spins around to face Harry. “Ew, why are  _you_  still here?” He wrinkles his nose.

Harry laughs. “Whatever you say,  _old man_.”

“Oh, now you’ve crossed the line.” Louis shakes his head.

Harry laughs once more, pulling Louis into his arms. He’s tall enough now to rest his head on top of Louis’s, and that is a very sobering realization. Strong arms are twined around Louis’s shoulders and waist; Harry must be working out. That’s a serious thought too, but not in a sobering way. More in a fuck-me-against-a-wall kind of way.

“Free me!” Louis groans, and Harry just holds on tighter.

“Happy birthday, Louis.” Harry says quietly.

“Thought I was an old man.” Louis pouts into Harry’s chest.

Louis can feel Harry shaking his head. “Nah. Not too old. Just right.”

“That’s what I thought. And you’re almost twenty one, arsehole, so if I’m old, you’re old.” Louis states.

“Is that so?” Harry asks.

“Indeed it is, Harry.”

“Well then I guess that means we’ve grown old together.”

Louis’s cheeks flush at that, at the thought of being old and wrinkled and sitting on a porch somewhere with grandkids on their laps, wedding rings still gleaming on their fingers.

“‘m tired.” Harry mutters after a while.

“Nap?” Louis suggests.

“Mhm.” Harry says quietly.

Louis tries to break free again, but he fails. “Well then lemme go, and we can go curl up on a couch.”

“I like curling up.” Harry says, freeing Louis from his grasp.

“I know you do, babe.”

Louis takes Harry’s hand and leads him to the couch, where they lay down for a nap.

When Louis wakes up, he’s tangled up in a pile of limbs, most of which are Harry’s. Somehow, he manages to escape them for the second time today, and he hops off the couch, about to make his way into the kitchen. He looks down at Harry, all curled up on the couch, a hand under his cheek and his hair splayed all over.  _He’s unfairly pretty_ , Louis thinks as he heads for the kitchen.

His mum is in there with Lottie and Dan, drinking a cup of tea as she puts something in the oven.

“Mum,  _please_  tell me you’re almost done cooking. It’s all you’ve done all day!” Louis sits on the counter.

Jay looks up. “This is the last thing I’ve got to make, and it’s Anne’s favorite.” She points to a recipe for chicken and parma ham. “And get your bum off the counter.”

Louis groans and slides off, and Dan and Lottie laugh. Harry comes in a moment later, looking like he’s still asleep.

“Hello, Harry.” Jay says.

“Hair looks great.” Lottie grins.

Harry frowns. “Don’t mock the hair, Charlotte.” He strikes a pose. “My hair is my best feature.”

Lottie laughs, but Louis makes grabby hands for Harry. He coddles him like a child. “No making fun of my boy, Lottie. That’s my job.”

“Oh, be nice, you two.” Jay pipes up.

“Yeah, might not get your presents otherwise.” Dan says.

“It’s my birthday, you’re morally obligated to give me gifts, you filthy animals.” Louis growls.

Jay gives him a look. “Lou.”

“Mum. It’s from a movie.” Lottie laughs.

“‘m gonna head home and change before dinner, I don’t think wearing clothes from when I was sixteen to Christmas Eve dinner will bode well with my mum.” Harry says.

“You look fine, dear, but if you’re sure.” Jay says.

“See you soon, Haz.” Louis gives him a little wave as he heads for the door.

“Bye!” Harry calls.

“I’m gonna do the same, I think.” Louis says once Harry’s shut the door.

“Go to the Styles’ and change?” Dan raises his eyebrows.

Louis narrows his eyes. “Oh, you know what I mean.” He says, and Dan laughs as he heads for the stairs.

Once upstairs, Louis goes right for the shower. He shaves (he likes the stubble, but Mum says it looks too casual for Christmas Eve dinner), washes his hair with the same shampoo Liam used to get the whipped cream out with earlier, and washes up with soap that smells like mint and makes his skin tingle. When he’s all clean and his hair is sticking up in a million different directions, Louis heads into his room to get dressed.

He pulls on a dark blue button down, and jeans, and then attempts to style his hair into some kind of orderliness. As soon as he’s downstairs, Louis is ordered to begin setting everything up. He puts out the fancy plates, arranges the sugar cookies in a fancy pyramid, and even helps put the mash into the bowl (this is a big step for Louis, he’s not usually this helpful).

Daisy and Phoebe come down soon, dressed up in their Christmas jumpers. Daisy’s is blue and gold, and Phoebe’s is green and red. Louis gives an over-dramatic gasp when he sees them, and falls to his knees.

“My god, who are these two supermodels in my  _house_?” He asks the ceiling.

The girls laugh. “Oh, come off it, Lou.” Phoebe waves a dismissive hand at him.

“Yeah, and get out of the way.” Daisy adds, just as the doorbell rings.

Louis shoots to his feet. “I’ve got it!” He calls.

He crosses the room in quick strides and pulls the old white door open. Standing on the porch is Harry and his family, and some boy Louis’s never seen. Anne is in the front, in a black jumper and silvery leggings. She goes for a hug as soon as Louis opens the door.

“Welcome home, Louis. So wonderful to see you.” Anne’s hug is warm and inviting, and Louis notices that she still wears the same perfume as when they were younger. She gives him a peck on the cheek on her way to the kitchen.

Robin is next, and he gives Louis a firm handshake and a big smile, along with a, “Good to see ya, Lou.”

“Well well well, if it isn’t little Louis Tomlinson.” It’s Gemma, with her dark hair dyed blonde again, a too-big Christmas jumper, and a sideways smirk just like Harry’s on her face.

“Hey, Gems.” Louis pulls her in for a hug, and is satisfied to see that they’re about the same height.

“Louis, this is Ashton, my boyfriend.” Gemms steps back and Louis sees a tall boy with floppy, sand-colored hair, bright green eyes, and a large smile standing on the porch.

Louis holds out a hand. “Hey, man, nice to meet you, come on inside. I’m Louis, but, you probably already knew that.”

Ashton takes his hand and shakes it. “Nice to finally put a face to the name that comes out of Harry’s mouth so often.” He laughs.

Louis just laughs and pats Ashton’s back. “You’re not from Donny, are you?”

“Nah, Hornsby Australia. It was the accent, wasn’t it?” Ashton asks.

“Yeah, mate- total giveaway.” Louis nods, and Ashton laughs on his way into the kitchen.

Harry is the last one to come in, and Louis’s mouth waters at the sight of him. He’s got on a plain white button-down with half of the buttons undone, tucked into jeans so tight it looks like he was poured into them. There’s a stupidly endearing red scarf tied around his neck, and his hair is messily parted to the side. Louis wants to kiss him until he forgets his name.

All fourteen of them (including Doris and Ernie) are split into groups and set up at different tables in the kitchen and computer room. That is, everyone except Louis and Harry. Jay says she just completely forgot, so, as not to worry her, Louis and Harry eat their food in the living room. On the floor.

Louis fills his plate with parma ham-wrapped chicken and leans up against the couch next to Harry.

“You look really nice, Lou.” Harry says after a while.

Louis cocks his head, cheeks heating up. “You think so?” He asks, mouth full of mash. “Thanks, Haz.”

“Sure, yeah.” Harry puts his head down again.

“Not that it matters, but I noticed I have not received a happy birthday from you, Harry Styles.” Louis points out.

Harry looks up. “Oh yeah… I guess I haven’t, huh?”

“No, you haven’t.” Louis nods.

“Well then, happy birthday, Louis. I’m glad I get to spend it with you.”  Harry leans over and kisses Louis on the cheek.

Louis is probably imagining it, but if feels like Harry’s lips linger longer than normal on his cheek. When he pulls away, it feels like there’s a hole burning through Louis’s face, and whether it’s from the kiss or the way his cheeks heat up, Louis doesn’t know.

“Me too, Harry. I missed you. A lot.” Louis says. He’s not sure why Harry needed to know that, but it seems like he should.

Harry gives him a small smile. “I missed you a lot too, old man.”

“Heeeeey.” Louis says, mimicking Harry.

“I’m getting more champagne.” Harry says, frowning as he stands.

“Well, I’m coming with you.” Louis stands as well.

The little drink cart is under the arch between the kitchen and the living room, but it’s at a weird angle, so Louis can’t see anyone in the kitchen. He begins to refill his champagne, and then he notices Harry grinning sheepishly at him.

“What’re you looking at me like that for?” Louis demands.

Slowly, Harry raises a hand to point at the ceiling. Louis looks up.

There, hung on a hook on the ceiling, is a sprig of mistletoe.

“You don’t- we don’t- my mum- she thought it-”

Louis stammers on and on, and then Harry’s kissing him. Finally, after all this goddamn time, Harry’s kissing him. Arms are wrapping around him, and their mouths are moving in synch, warm and wet and still tasting like champagne. It feels every bit as good as Louis always imagined it, and Harry’s lips are soft and a bit chapped and Louis wants to kiss them until he’s old and gray.

“You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do that.” Harry mutters into Louis’s lips.

“I bet I’ve been wanting to do it longer.”

“I really, highly doubt that.”

Louis kisses him again, just because he can.

After a little while, they take their champagne and head into the kitchen with their arms around each other. They spend a while talking with their families, until Niall, Liam, and Zayn come over around ten. All seventeen of them cram into the living room, each of them telling stories about old Christmases.

Louis is sat between Harry’s legs, leaning against his chest with his head on Harry’s collarbone and shoulder. “How’re we supposed to tell everyone?” He whispers.

“I have an idea.” Harry smirks, standing. Louis stands too, a little worried. “Excuse me everyone? Yes, can I have your attention?”

“What’re you going to- oh!” Louis yelps as Harry dips him low and presses a long, closed-mouth kiss to his lips.

They straighten up, faces flushed and smiles embarrassed. “So, yeah.” Harry says.

Starting with Niall, everyone in the room begins to clap.

“I can’t believe you made us wait so fuckin’ long!” Niall shouts.

“Yeah, that was real rude, boys.” Gemma adds.

“Well, I’m sorry we inconvenienced all of you.” Louis snaps, and everyone laughs.

The rest of Louis’s birthday is spent with his friends and family in the living room, talking and laughing and having a wonderful time. Sitting there, in the arms of Harry and surrounded by his family and friends, Louis knows there’s no Christmas or birthday present that will ever compare.


End file.
